Yes, I Can!

Now, left another two weeks to go for my PRE-AS examinations. This weekend, I went out with my parents who came to visit me from Alor Setar. This is because, they knew their little daughter has been missing home quite long. They took a chance to visit me at the same time my brother too... Well, I had so much fun as I get to meet them and most importantly, the time being with family is so precious that u wished the time would just paused there for even just a few minutes or just slow down. Its been so long that I din get to talk heart to heart with my mummy till the last two days. Friday, Saturday and this morning, I told her everything that happened including all the secrets that I have been keeping to myself so long. That's the MAIN BIG difference talking to family members than friends. Even when papa heard me complaining, he'll still be by my side supporting me. How warm is that? I miss u, papa and mummy! And thanks for coming so far to visit me~

Thanks papa and mummy for bringing me lots of hometown food like Loh Mee, Loh Mai Kai and homemade food like my mum's best dishes. She make all the chickens for me and what I need to do is just to fry them... DELICIOUS! They also bought many things as a treat to my housemates, classmates and close friends. So, they brought me around, eating together... Though we didn't go many places, but again I would like to say that the time being together is the best! In the hotel, I talk heart to heart with my mummy. Papa will advise me with the good things and correct me when he realised which parts did I do wrong. These moments I really do appreciate so much! Then, we went shopping together. Everything we did together. But, the time really fly this three days... However, this is better than none. I appreciate every moment when we are together... ^^

So, all the funs ended in the afternoon. Once I stepped into my apartment, oh goodness!!! The atmosphere was like so damn STRESSED UP. Three three of them were facing their books making me so guilty cos goodness sake, I din touch my books the whole weekend! Then, when I talked to them, only one listened to me, the other two were just SO ignorant. Well, actually I understand, PRE-AS is important to everyone of us. I don't blame them. It's me, myself who should balance my time well... But, I just couldn't stand the atmosphere. Then, it is also today that I got to know I need to attend prep class which is a class at night to revise for those weak students in KTT. Nobody told me and I think I'm the last one to know. U know, the feeling that time was not good, but still I have to smile to disguise myself so that nobody knows.

Actually, I think this is my own personal problem. I can't accept still... I'm afraid of the way people will look at me, and the way they judge me. Being a good student in high school put a very high expectation from everyone to me. When I told my friends that I dun really do well, they said that I'm lieing, but actually I'm not! There are too many geniuses here! Sometimes, I just couldn't bare. I tried telling myself just compete with yourself! Don't care about the others... So, today, my heart was soooooooooooo HAPPY in the morning, but in the afternoon, it was soooooooooo DOWN. Before my papa went back, he advised me again and again to do well so that I will pass the cut-off points and fly to India next year. Not to disappoint him, I must strive till the very end.

So, keeping my head being in the positive mind, I must always believe that I can do it! Keep telling myself, "YES! I CAN!"